Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Another day at Casa Damasco

We spend the afternoon at Casa Damasco (link on the left of the page) again and just like last time I left feeling rather useless, if I’m going to keep going there this will have to change...right? Why go if you’re helping in any way....right?
The lady that sits by the door all day (her name is Otencia...may have spelt it wrong) was sitting by the door again with all her belongings and still wearing the same clothes. Today I noticed that her bags of belonging was just all garbage, empty crushed pop cans, crushed milk carton, bottle caps, wads of used tissues.....garbage to me but obviously this stuff is like her security blanket, she will not let it out of her sight. In a way she’s no different that the rest of us that work and work so that we can collect stuff to hang on to, and store in boxes and closets and sheds....at least she knows where her stuff is, I can’t find most of mine. Today she showed me how rich she was, she pulled out a little plastic baggie that had strips of newspaper cut into dollar bill size strips, she had it all nicely wadded up as if it was a big wad of cash and proudly flipped through it showing me her money. I had brought her a beautiful lipstick, hairbrush (thank-you Arlene) and a nail file; she was impressed with it and thanked me and then quickly stashed it all in another little baggie and stuffed it in her pocket as if she was afraid someone would take it. I tried to tell her to try the lipstick but she just kept saying thank-you. We did however have a breakthrough of some kind, she allowed us to lay hands on her and pray, Frank (Baptist Pastor from the US) was even able to anoint her with oil. Up until today she had never allowed anyone to pray for her or even touch her. She even ended the prayer with a “thank-you God” I just sat beside her for a while after we had served lunch and she seemed more at peace, she wasn’t rambling on like last time. As I was sitting there I was silently praying for the holy Spirit to fill her and push out whatever was holding her captive, then out of no where she got really angry and started yelling and shaking her finger at everyone in the room...people that hadn’t even been paying attention to her, she turned to me and yelled and shook her finger angrily in my face, grabbed all her belongings and stomped out the door. Wow....I was completely dumb founded. There was a Spanish Pastor there today that also spoke English, when I asked him what she was saying he just said that she doesn’t make sense and that she is just crazy and to ignore her tantrums and that this was normal behaviour for her. How can I help this lady if I am ignoring her? Or do I ignore her but just keep coming so that she will come to realize that she can’t chase me away and that I really do care for her. (I’ll go with that until I come up with something better) She looks like such a beautiful young women and it’s just such a shame that her mind is such a mess. She didn’t go far; just as we were leaving she came back. The rest of the people seemed the same as last week, all sitting the same chairs staring at the floor only lifting their head to acknowledge me when I took their hand in mine to greet them. At least Otencia livens the place up a bit with her tantrums.
They were all excited because someone had donated some paint to paint the place, which is great because it really needs painting but I’m afraid they are just going to paint over the dirt and grim....more then it needs paint it needs a good cleaning first, if they cleaned it they might find that it doesn’t even need painting. Do I say something or not? I opted for not.

More Thoughts on living on the Island

It turns out it is not that expensive to furnish a house here, I was worried about having to buy a stove and fridge. I wandered through a Soriensa department store yesterday and found that I could buy a new stove for 1099.00 pesos (conversion link to the left of the page.....yes it’s there now) and a new fridge is just over 2000.00 pesos, so I’m thinking a used one would be even less. Lydia has stuff I could borrow like sheets and towels and etc, sooooo now I am really thinking about it. On the other hand I know the rent money I pay Lydia for staying at her house is going into her ministry on the Island. She told me that she had been praying for God to provide some way for her to be able to buy Christmas gifts for some of the kids out there that she knows will not be receiving gifts and my rent money came at perfect time. We’re going shopping next week to buy gifts.....and we’re going to make cookie bags for the parents.....yes we’re going to be baking up a storm this weekend. I’m so excited, this is when buying gifts is fun......this is what Christmas should be like (my opinion). I am so thankful to have this opportunity.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

A Huge Dilemma

I had initially wanted to live on this Island instead of in the city; but I was advised that it would not be safe for a single woman to live alone there. While I am fairly comfortable living with Lydia there is still a tugging on my brain that I want to live on the Island. The school I teach at in Madero is a short bus ride from the docks, Casa Damasco is a short walk from the docks, my friends Barbara and Al, and my favourite coffee shop are all within walking distance from the docks....it just seems to make sense. While we were visiting there yesterday we met a lady that told us of a little apartment for rent on Island. (her daughter used to rent it) It is owned by a teacher, she has built a little apartment on the top floor of her house complete with a separate entrance. The place is totally fenced in making it very secure, and since she is living downstairs with her husband it is not like I would be totally alone. Everyone agreed that I would be completely safe there. The only downfall is that the only thing in it is a bed, no other furniture or even a stove or fridge...nothing, not a dish not a spoon. If it were furnished I would already be moving in. The rent is so cheap, 600 pesos a month.....and it is so cute, with a roof top patio.....I could even have a container garden up there. It’s a short walk from the docks, and a short walk to the most beautiful peaceful beach, and most yummy seafood restaurants. What to do...what to do? Lydia is also considering it because it would help her relationship with the people on the Island if she lived there, she would get to spend more time with them. If I take it and it works well for me she may rent it after I leave in May......great for her, I will have furnished it.

A Day on Stone Island

December 11, 2008 – Today I spent the whole day on Stone Island with Lydia. Stone Island is not really an Island it is a peninsula attached to Mazatlan, to get there by road is not easy, you have to drive all the way around the city to get to the road and it is assessable only by truck, a car would drown in the ruts, if it has rained you cannot get there at all. So you get back and forth by water taxi....little motor boats. The cost is 5 pesos each way and if you live there it’s even less. I’ve been coming here for a few years now because it is so quiet and peaceful, just a beautiful escape from the crowded city. The beach, in my opinion is much nicer than in the city, it’s wider and far less crowded. My visits to the Island have been limited to spending time lounging by the beach with a good book, eating delicious seafood from one of the many palapa restaurants that line the beach, taking a horseback tour through the coconut plantation....and then reluctantly heading back to the city. This time my visit was very different, I didn’t even see the big wide beach where I used to lounge. I was also given a little history today as to how the Island first started off....it was an Island in the beginning. The city of Mazatlan used the Island to store the unwanted people there, there was huge lepers colony, a mental institute, anyone with a disease that could spread, and instead of keeping the criminals in jail they send them to Stone Island. Many people that live there now are descendants of those people. This place is full of all kinds of horrible problems and not the tranquil peaceful place I have always thought it was. There’s a church for witches, they have a beautiful little church with pretty stained glass windows, if you didn’t know any better you would think it was a little catholic church. There are demonic people, people that are deemed mentally insane, there is drugs and alcohol abuse, so much sexual abuse and physical abuse. The beautiful setting (and it is beautiful) is a wonderful cover for the dirtiness. This had been Satan’s kingdom for many years......where do you begin the healing for these people?
I followed Lydia around as she did some home visits to people she has come to know over the years that need a kind word or just a hand to hold. Our first stop was an old lady that lives by herself in a tiny little shack, in the last 3 weeks she has started to slowly go deaf and blind and has extreme pain in her knees keeping her from leaving her house. Her family for some reason does not come to see her anymore. Since she can’t understand when you talk to her she seems to make things up and thus not making much sense most of the time, which may be the reason why her family is not coming to see her anymore. For example, this morning she told us that her son in law had come and cut the wires to her electricity because he did not wan to pay for it anymore (she has no means to pay for it) but when we talked to her daughter later in the day she said that there had been a short in wiring and being afraid it would cause a fire he had the electricity turned off until he could fix the short. ...a few misunderstanding like that could surely cause some friction in the family. She is afraid that the doctors don’t know how to bring back her eyesight and her hearing; she says the medication he gave her makes it worse. She told Lydia that every week she waits by the door for her, she doesn’t even take time to clean her house, she just sits and waits. She was very firm when she said “I don’t like a dirty house so you must come more often” (in Spanish of course). How lonely she must be. From there we move on to another lady who also cannot leave her house because she is very obese, which also just started happening not too long ago, the doctors can’t seem to figure out why she is just getting bigger and bigger, and of course angle and back pain. She had requested a bible which Lydia had brought for her (her birthday present from her son). She is also just a very lonely lady that just wants someone to come and visit and hold her hand. This is how we made our way through the Island, visiting one sad, lonely lady after another, each one that had raised many children and now sit by door alone hoping someone will stop by. This is not right. This reminds me of how important it is have a good, strong and most of all a forgiving relationship with my own child and with The Lord now so that when I am old and senile and perhaps a little difficult to be around (more so than now) my child will not abandon me and I can gain strength from the Lord. Our last visit was the most touching, a young lady that had been struggling with AIDS for the last 5 years, she is now confined to a bed and slowly deteriorating, I don’t think she weighed 65 lbs, could barely lift her arms and has to be fed and cleaned like a baby. She confessed today that she had a great fear of dying, her past had been very sinful and she was afraid for death to come. Lydia assured her that there was a way to insure she end up in Gods heavenly arms to live forever more in heaven, free of sin and free of AIDS. As we held her she gave her life to Christ and we continued to pray that she can hold on to that promise of everlasting life in heaven. Though this should now be a happy ending to the story it is not, as her husband also has AIDS it just hasn’t progressed as far yet and they have 2 small children who have not yet been tested (to our knowledge). Should these children by some miracle not have the disease, they will become orphans. This makes me ask “God, how could this possibly be your plan?”. Perhaps he knew this would be the only way she would accept Christ so she could be saved? What about the children, how is this for their good? I have many questions even though I know I am only supposed to have faith that God knows what he is doing and I don’t need to know the details.